Monday, July 20, 2009
- de imperfection -
is it possible for me to lose 5kgs in a month time?

seriously
i'm fat

compare to those girls that are consider as thin
gosh i'm so fat

everytime i ask others whether am i fat?

they answered me
- no la not fat lah * which is a lie *
- no la ngam ngam hou ma * also a lie *
- average lo * consider as a lie *
- chubby * this is de truth *

i don't wanna be just average
i wanna be thin!

i'm not satisfy bout myself now
I AM NOT!

i hate myself in this figure
i see fats everywhere!
i hate it!

i used to be so fat after i had my appendicitis operation in standard 4
i weigh fucking 75kg during my secondary school period!

gosh
i can't even imagine
i don't even dare to look at my pictures that i took during that period

oh wait
i don't take pictures that time

mainly because i've been sick all de time
no it's not because of de fatness
it's something else

anyway
i started to diet since form 4 or form 5
n now finally i get to 55kg

but hell i'm still fat!
my ideal weight is 50kg
i still got 5kgs more to put down!

although i said i wanna diet all de time
but i ended up fail in de end
n i hate myself for that

i wanna lose that fucking 5kgs in a month
why a month?
hmm perhaps it's because my birthday is coming in a month plus?

no idea

anyway
maybe these could help

- jogging
- stair climbing
- sit-ups everyday
- on strict diet
- no snacks
- no chocolate
- no deep fried
- no potatoes
- no mayonnaise
- no cheese
- no fast food
- no ice cream
- no whatever stuff is which fattening

but it's so fucking difficult!
as people who knows me well
they all know i love potatoes
i love mayonnaise
i love deep fried stuff
i love all fattening stuff!

maybe i should just cut down on snacks
then try not to eat so much
it won't be effective if i just diet n got no exercise at all

so here's my plan

- jog and stair climbing on alternate days
- at least 50 sit-ups per day
- one meal per day
- eat sandwich and rice on alternate days * mommy asked me to eat rice == *
- try to cut down on snacks
- if possible go swimming

but what if i build muscle instead of being thin? ==

i know for sure people will say i'm not gonna do it as i'm a really lazy person
but if i wanna lose weight
i must do it

i don't like being call fat nor chubby
no girls like that right?

will i be able to do so?
god knows

i'll only able to start my jogging next week as i don't have a proper footwear for it
so i guess i'll just start of with de diet plan first

don't pour me cold water people
else i won't friend you
i'm serious!
chuilynn says at 9:14:00 PM
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